12 Comments

  1. Julie L
    February 16, 2018 @ 6:40 am

    Suzy, This is such an important reminder! I really like the examples you gave in number 3. Well stated. Even at my age I enjoy accolades and expression of love from my parents too! Have a lovely weekend! Julie

    Reply

    • EmptyNestBlessed
      February 16, 2018 @ 3:48 pm

      Julie,
      Thanks so much for your comment! I’m with you – what my parents think of me is still so important to me! We all need a cheerleader and we all need to feel loved. Happy weekend! xoxo Suzy

      Reply

  2. Anne Hart
    February 16, 2018 @ 10:15 am

    Great tips, Suzy! I can especially relate to number four! This is something I’ve been learning too; basically never stop being their mom. Don’t think because they are adults now that you stand on equal ground. Don’t expect them to be interested in your life, job, interests. Concentrate on being there for them, and find your friendships with like minded people your own age.
    Thanks for the confirmation!

    Reply

    • EmptyNestBlessed
      February 16, 2018 @ 3:51 pm

      Anne,
      Wow, you are so right. I was actually thinking about that as I wrote this post. It really never is equal, is it? We need those friends our own age. Your kids are great, but they’ll never see you as a peer. (And you’ll never see them as one either.) That’s some good hard, truth you shared, my friend. THANK YOU for sharing that and for being so honest. xoxo Suzy

      Reply

  3. Kellie
    February 17, 2018 @ 6:14 am

    This post is so full of good information and encouragement. Keep ‘Em coming Suzy. And Anne’s comment is so spot on and a great reminder too.
    Thanks!!

    Reply

    • EmptyNestBlessed
      February 17, 2018 @ 7:37 pm

      Kellie,
      Thank you so much! That is so kind of you. Yes! Anne is right on – a tough truth to hear, but a truth nonetheless. You were so sweet to leave me a comment and take a moment to tell me you liked the post. Blessings to you! xoxo Suzy

      Reply

  4. martha
    February 17, 2018 @ 7:15 am

    Such a good post and you are so right with these suggestions! Very good reminders b/c once our children are on their own, it takes a different approach to stay close with them. As their lives get busy, children come along, moves to different cities, etc, it takes more effort to keep a healthy and good relationship. Another reminder I try (try being key here ????) to do at times is to think back when my husband and I were their age, young married, making our own decisions etc, what would we like, what advice did we appreciate, what we did not like and NOT want to hear.
    Thanks for your thoughts and I am so glad you are better!

    Reply

    • EmptyNestBlessed
      February 17, 2018 @ 7:39 pm

      Martha,
      You are right on, gal! Bob and I were JUST talking about that very thing today and I said, “Aw, I should have put that in my post!” Now I don’t have to go back and add it because you thoughtfully mentioned it here. THANK YOU!!! I’m grateful. xoxo Suzy

      Reply

  5. Linda Whalen
    November 15, 2019 @ 10:48 am

    This is a great website! Thank you..

    Reply

    • EmptyNestBlessed
      November 15, 2019 @ 2:00 pm

      Linda,
      What a kind thing to say! I’ve worked hard on it, so that really means a lot to me. Thank you!
      xoxo Suzy

      Reply

  6. Kat
    January 24, 2020 @ 5:39 pm

    Hey Suzy, great article. From the perspective of an adult child, I’d like to add my two cents. My parents pray for me and constantly tell me they are praying for me as a way to show love but truth be told, that means little when they make it clear that they have no real interest in getting to know me as an individual. They assume, as many parents do, that they know their children because they raised them. But children are not extensions of parents, they are their own complete person that takes time and genuine interest to really get to know. And this may come as a shocker to some but your adult children have opinions and experiences that are just as valid as yours. I think it would be beneficial for parents to remember, you are not automatically granted a close relationship with your adult child. It must be earned with time and trust like any other relationship.

    Side note, if you’re going to be generous and give money or help your child move, whatever it may be, absolutely do not hold that over them and in anger say things like “look at everything I’ve done for you”. It voids your generosity.

    In conclusion, I really believe most adult children, above everything, would rather be treated as an equal. Treated with respect to their ideas and approached by their parents with a genuine curiosity about who they are. But what do I know, ask your own adult children what it is they truly desire from you and your relationship.

    Reply

    • EmptyNestBlessed
      January 24, 2020 @ 7:14 pm

      Kat,
      WOW! Thank you so much for your candor and honesty! I am so grateful to you for taking the time to write this and share it with me.
      I would like ot ask your permission to share it (completely anonymously, of cours) in an upcoming blog post.
      I think it would really help a lot of parents!
      Would you let me know if that would be okay? You can just reply to this comment or email me at suzy@emptynestblessed.com.
      THANK YOU!!!!
      xoxo
      Suzy

      Reply

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